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What do vegetarians eat in a country where refusing meat is regarded as a sign of madness?

If you're a vegetarian, you might be able to relate to some of these anecdotes in a BBC article subtitled, "What do vegetarians eat in a country where refusing meat is regarded as a sign of madness?". They include such doozies as:

In South Africa, requesting vegetables is like swearing at the wait-staff. One bewildered waiter told me haughtily, "But, vegetables is what food eats."

Where's the beef?

Recently, WSJ's Tripti Lahiri has blogged a couple of times on the legal status of the slaughter and consumption of beef in India. Apparently, the law directing states to protect the cow was (perhaps seemingly) enacted to organise agriculture and agriculture on modern and scientific lines.